![]() We often do this when we’re listening to the constant chatter of a preschool child. Right.’ We may practice selective listening, hearing only certain parts of the conversation. We may be ignoring another person, not really listening at all. “When another person speaks, we’re usually ‘listening’ at one of four levels. You sense, you intuit, you feel.” The 5 Levels of ListeningĮmpathic listening is the highest form of listening, level 5, but we usually listen at levels 1-4. You use your right brain as well as your left. “In empathic listening, you listen with your ears, but you also, and more importantly, listen with your eyes and with your heart. The essence of empathic listening is not that you agree with someone it’s that you fully, deeply, understand that person, emotionally as well as intellectually.” How Do You Do Empathic Listeningĭon’t just use your brain. And it is sometimes the more appropriate emotion and response. Sympathy is a form of agreement, a form of judgment. Via The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: It’s about understanding them emotionally, as well as intellectually. The Essence of Empathic ListeningĮmpathic listening is not about agreeing with somebody. In his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey writes about what empathic listening is, what it is not, why it’s important, and how we can use empathic listening in our dally lives to seek to understand others, as well as make deposits in Emotional Bank Accounts. It’s listening until the other person feels understood. He said that empathic listening is not listening until you understand. The best way I’ve heard empathic listening defined was by Covey himself. What’s the best way to really seek to understand, to really listen to somebody? We’ve all heard of Stephen Covey’s habit #5, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” "Most people do not listen with the intent to understand they listen with the intent to reply.” - Stephen Covey
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